Finally, “I can’t imagine how that could be. You don’t seem bashful to me...”“I’m not bashful. It’s just that ... Oh, crap, I don’t kn...w what it is. I’m always a bit of a loner, I suppose, no matter how many people are around me. I do get along with almost all the women, although, there are a couple of sluts that I try to stay away from, lest I be painted by the same brush. There’s no obvious animosity between us, and I don’t think I’m better than they are, but I’m not into drunken parties. I won't ask anymore. You win. There will be no repeat with Marcus or anyone else. Satisfied?" she said.I heard her, and I think I tried to smile. "I feed to fleep. I tire," I said.I stumbled up the stairs and made it to the bathroom, that just before an estimated seven Cuervos on the rocks brought about an intestinal revolution—or maybe it was a revulsion—that caused me to spend a deal of time worshipping at the porcelain altar.Marianne stood just inside the door to the bathroom the whole time. Pretty soon our conversation turned toward erotica and sex, and we began talking about past experiences and what we were looking for that night.I told her that I was a professional masturbator, having done just about everything to my body I could think of. I’ve done a lot of ass play with my fingers, my hand, dildos, and butt plugs. I had tried to put my cock into my ass but hadn’t yet been successful. I told her about how I liked to throw my legs over my head and suck on my cock. She listened. She knows I love you. She knows you love me and want to make love with me. She knows you want a long-term relationship with me. So does she. She’s convinced though, that if she tells me to stop seeing you, then I would forever wonder what might be, forever wonder if I had missed an opportunity and that could destroy our relationship. In the end, it’s up to you. I can’t commit in the way you want. I can’t promise anything. So the question remains. What do you want? What do you expect?”“I want.
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